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12 The Prince cried, “Who’s this dirty slut?“Off with her nut! Cinderella is turned off by the idea of a man who beheads people and wishes to be married to a “lovely feller.” Immediately her wish is granted and she lives happily ever after. Great rhyming also, keep up the great work. it's no holds barred with Roald Dahl..I love his wicked sense of fun !! The next day the Prince brings it to the house and she triumphantly shows him that it fits. She bellowed 'Help!' He calls her a “dirty slut” and prepares to kill her. And Cindy's luck starts looking sicker. He provides a re-interpretation and surprise ending instead of the traditional happily-ever-after ending. The Prince sees the lost shoe and immediately grasps it. The Prince screamed, 'No!' I love how these are really entertaining for children but also very amusing for … Annie Use Your Telescope 24 The poem begins with the speaker stating that the story which is about to follow is not the one the reader might expect. I love reading and writing spoofs on the old fairy tales and you've written a great one here. Cherry Cream Soda Bubblegum Sans You did a good job with this, it's sad that they changed all the fairy tales to ones of happiness in the end just to make it easier on the kids. The fairy does not put up any resistance to this demanding version Cinderella. Just as before, the wish is granted instantaneously. He grabbed her dress to hold her back. A reader will not be expecting this brutal action in the midst of a fairytale. Fontdiner Swanky px, Please allow access to the microphone It reminds me of how all those old stories were gothic and creepy before Disney took over. 'So now you've got to marry me!' And quickly, in no time at all, At midnight she hears the clock and runs off, tearing her dress and losing a slipper. It gave me a big smile and i love all the twists and turns and how he gets to the real truth of the matter. To see her dancing with the Prince. Escolar It starts out with the Ugly Stepsisters going off to the ball while Cinderella is locked in the cellar. The Prince vows to marry the girl that fits the shoe. do you have any more twists-on-fairy-tales? The irony lies in Cinderella getting what she wished for and then realising that it’s not what she really wants at all. And they were happy ever after. The Ugly Sisters, jewels and all, 'The Prince roared back. Yanone Kaffeesatz The smell is no better. I love the twists and turns to this poem! Chewy VT323 (A normal foot got lost inside. Oswald He pressed it to his pounding heart, 'There is a Disco at the Palace! Lynche - 'Tis indeed a laughing poem, based upon a tale based upon an Irish parable made out of disdain of the Catholics, for the cinder girl is an apex and aspect of the Cinder Goddess. Finally one of the sisters tries it on and of course it fits. Ribeye Marrow Includes the text, questions and a mark scheme. I have to admit, I did recite it to myself a few times while writing this (voices and all…) and I still remember all the words! And quickly flushed it down the loo. He placed it on a crate of beer. Kranky She says she’s had her fill of princes and money. Began to nibble at her feet. Mind you, they got the first bit right, 'Until I've tracked the maiden down!' Arial 'Off with her nut! Why does everyone sound like FOGHORN LEGHORN? She just wants a decent man. This is in an effort to separate her further from the girl the reader might be picturing. 'The handsome Prince will fall for me!' Cinderella heard the thuds Coming Soon 18 Extremely amusing and such a breath of fresh air to read the real story. Fredericka the Great But she screamed, 'Yes! And lost one slipper on the stair. Jim Aldrich There are six revolting rhymes retelling famous tales such as Cinderella, Jack and the Beanstalk and Little Red Riding Hood, each one being full of gruesome details and full of satire. Whoopee! Close. It made the Ugly Sisters winceTo see her dancing with the Prince.She held him very tight and pressedHerself against his manly chest.The Prince himself was turned to pulp,All he could do was gasp and gulp.Then midnight struck. As Cindy shouted, 'Let me go!' My two brothers, my sister and I must have driven our parents crazy, playing the tape on loop every single morning on the drive to school, and reciting the rhymes along with Timothy West and Prunella Scales – voices and all. Open Sans Advanced search. After the ball is over and everyone has returned home, a new day dawns. Alack!' (adsbygoogle=window.adsbygoogle||[]).push({}); Author Roald Dahl using Gioconda 4B graphite. The Fairy said, 'Hang on a tick.' All he could do was gasp and gulp. Alas! Freckle Face Architects Daughter We'll assume you're ok with this, but you can opt-out if you wish. This poem shows a different side of the Cinderella story that everyone knows. The real one’s much more gory.The phoney one, the one you know,Was cooked up years and years ago,And made to sound all soft and sappyJust to keep the children happy.Mind you, they got the first bit right,The bit where, in the dead of night,The Ugly Sisters, jewels and all,Departed for the Palace Ball,While darling little CinderellaWas locked up in a slimy cellar,Where rats who wanted things to eat,Began to nibble at her feet. THis is a cool rendetion of the original. Absolutely fantastic, it’s got the edge on the other one, i really like this. It must have made an impression…. I would hav eloved to have seent he stepsister's head roll, Thank you Jim for sharing this one with us. The Prince sets out just as said he would to “knock on all the doors in town.” The tension in the town grew, just as it does in the thirty-eight lines of the stanza. https://twitter.com/empiremagazine/status/1312035494407090177, Anne Hathaway is the Grand High Witch in Robert Zemeckis' new take on Roald Dahl's #TheWitches. He would rather the reader hear the full truth. I grew up with teachers reading his poetry to us in class and I think that he has greatly influenced my way of writing. Love Ya Like A Sister At once, one of the Ugly Sisters, It fits! The ugly sister is not deterred. The login page will open in a new tab. After logging in you can close it and return to this page. The only part of the traditional story that’s true is the “first bit” in which Cinderella is left at home by her step sister while they attend the ball. 22 I love it!!! Rather than call it disgusting or smelly, it is a “wee bit icky.”. She is going to accomplish this with her newly acquired looks and fancy clothes. I like this very n=much. He is sure in that moment that he will be able to find the missing woman and make her his “bride!” His plan does not go as well in this telling of the story as it does in the original. Ads are what helps us bring you premium content! 'They're hard to find. And shouted, 'Get me to the Ball! Orbitron Subscribe to our mailing list and get new poetry analysis updates straight to your inbox. The poem starts out by telling us that the real version of the story is much gorier than the sanitized tale we’ve all heard. 28 Was locked up in a slimy cellar, Just Me Again Down Here Seemingly unbothered by the death of her sister, the other comes up and decides to try on the shoe. Departed for the Palace Ball, The Prince went white from ear to ear. Lobster Two

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